1. Recall, briefly, the friendship that begins this story. Describe the two individuals. How are they similar? Different? What brings the two gentlemen together as friends?
2. As different as Nouwen and Bratman are from one another,
Nouwen illustrates another vision on p. 19:
“In the midst of the many changes in our lives, both of us came into closer touch with our deeper desires. Different though our circumstances were, we both had to deal with the pains of rejection and separation, and both of us realized increasingly our desire for intimacy and friendship. To avoid being drowned in bitterness and resentment, we both had to draw on our deepest spiritual resources. Differences became less important, similarities more obvious. As our friendship grew deeper and stronger, our desire for a common spiritual foundation became more explicit.”
How does this description change the way we are able to see humanity?
3. Not wanting him to give up his dreams, Nouwen says to Bratman, “You are young, full of energy, well trained . . . Everything is possible for you . . . . Why let the world squeeze you in? . . . Why become the victim? You are free to do what you want -- if, that is, you really want it!”
What are the risks that Nouwen and Bratman demand of one another? Why would a person choose this kind of risk? Have you in your life ever taken a risk stretching you as Henri and Fred are stretched?
Reflection:
In your own life, tell the story of a friend whose presence in your life changed you, seemingly for good or ill. What characteristics do you assign both yourself and this friend as you look back and reflect on this relationship?
